Bubble gum and toilet paper

Yesterday, while at the zoo, my friend's son decided to drink water that splashed onto the ground from a decorative fountain.  At the time, it was funny, because when she picked him up, he had some mud on his face.  We had a good laugh.  With the intention of eliminating her angst over the matter, I shared with her a story of B and Z (Z being B's good friend).  Yesterday, I thought the following story was a family best ... 

B and Z and their mother's went to lunch.  After picking up the food, B and Z's moms noticed both boys were chewing gum.  No problem ... except they didn't give them gum.  "Where did you get the gum?"  B and Z pointed under the table.  Again, yesterday, I thought these two boys held a record for gross things in the mouth ... Here are some pictures of them.  They were close to 3 when they discovered sticky presents under the table and the first image is from that year.  The second is more recent ...

Today ... Today, the kids and I were at Science City.  (Have we mentioned that we love Kansas City, Union Station and Science City?  Well, we do.)  Back to today ... Today, something happened that might just trump bubble gum.  I took the kiddies to use the loo.  B can help himself, but Little Miss still needs my help.  She and I entered a stall.  As I was locking it, I see her pick up toilet paper from OFF THE FLOOR and before I can reach her ... She wiped her face with it while simultaneously saying, "Mom, I wipe my nose all myself!!"  I'm sure the other patrons were wondering who the crazy lady was who suddenly started yelling, "Ahh!!  Put that down!  Put that down!  Yuck!"  I'm pretty sure Little Miss' thought's were on the same wavelength as the patrons.  (20 years from now, our progeny, "Remember when mom lost it in the bathroom?")  Maybe yell is too strong a word ... More like, loudly speak or firmly speak.  Yeah, that makes me sound like less of a crazy lady yelling in a handicap stall ... Whatever the case, it's done.  She got cleaned up and we ended up having a fabulous day in Kansas City - just me and the kiddies.  Most importantly, we have a fantastic story to use as leverage - maybe.  So today, B has been ousted.  B needn't worry too much, he still holds other records ... most trips to the ER, only one to have a cast, only one to have x-rays of earrings in one's intestine and stomach ... We just hope Little Miss doesn't oust B in anymore categories like this one.  Besides, it's not a healthy competition.  NOT AT ALL.

(Isn't she adorable?  March 2010 in Salt Lake City.)